Should I get married?
Powered by Max Banner Ads
I am young enough to be a father but too ancient to rebuild all my life after divorce again. I still want to be an involved father more than whatever business in the world. Until just just I thought this meant I needed to get married again. But the dates I have had just have caused me to question this assumption. Do I need a wife? Perhaps excellent reader you want to offer your view on this topic.
Under NZ law a 3 year defaco relationship is the same as marriage. So for a male any long term relationship carries all the same risks as marriage. For simplicity I will talk in this area “marriage” or “being married”. But in fact I mean “have a relationship for longer than 3 years”. In other words it is not relevant if there is a marriage ceremony or not. That is not the issue. It is just rather long winded to say should I stay with a woman for more than 3 years?
Dear reader keep in mind that my parents were childhood sweathearts who married until “fatality do us part”. Which to them meant exactly that. Therefore this is my view of marriage also. I have by no means had any problem getting dates. I was married. Staying married requires both peple to work on the relationship which requires certain qualities. Finding a woman who is and will always stay comitted to marriage I have found to be so far impracticable.
I am still open to that. If happen to bump into the like of my life then fantastic. I surely take fantastic pleasure in loving and being loved by a name special.
But now I am questioning why would I hunt for it and sign up to marriage?
It is nice and would be best for any child but the risks and costs are extrodinary. Any child has a high risk of being denied one parent anyway. It seems to me that the laws and women themselves have priced themselves out of the market. I don’t want to reach retirement in poverty it is right. But more than that I can’t afford to have another child shut out of my life. But there is a greater than 50% chance of exactly both of those things happening.
Do I risk having a shortened life of poverty for a 50% chance of having a child and a wife?
Or do I find another way to have a child (who may well have no mother) ?
Delight don’t tell me to change the system. In case you haven’t noticed the system has not changed and I will not live for ever. I have to make a choice based on the society and the system I live in now.
Should I get married?
I am young enough to be a father but too ancient to rebuild all my life after divorce again. I still want to be an involved father more than whatever business in the world. Until just just I thought this meant I needed to get married again. But the dates I have had just have caused me to question this assumption. Do I need a wife? Perhaps excellent reader you want to offer your view on this topic.
Under NZ law a 3 year defaco relationship is the same as marriage. So for a male any long term relationship carries all the same risks as marriage. For simplicity I will talk in this area “marriage” or “being married”. But in fact I mean “have a relationship for longer than 3 years”. In other words it is not relevant if there is a marriage ceremony or not. That is not the issue. It is just rather long winded to say should I stay with a woman for more than 3 years?
Dear reader keep in mind that my parents were childhood sweathearts who married until “fatality do us part”. Which to them meant exactly that. Therefore this is my view of marriage also. I have by no means had any problem getting dates. I was married. Staying married requires both peple to work on the relationship which requires certain qualities. Finding a woman who is and will always stay comitted to marriage I have found to be so far impracticable.
I am still open to that. If happen to bump into the like of my life then fantastic. I surely take fantastic pleasure in loving and being loved by a name special.
But now I am questioning why would I hunt for it and sign up to marriage?
It is nice and would be best for any child but the risks and costs are extrodinary. Any child has a high risk of being denied one parent anyway. It seems to me that the laws and women themselves have priced themselves out of the market. I don’t want to reach retirement in poverty it is right. But more than that I can’t afford to have another child shut out of my life. But there is a greater than 50% chance of exactly both of those things happening.
Do I risk having a shortened life of poverty for a 50% chance of having a child and a wife?
Or do I find another way to have a child (who may well have no mother) ?
Delight don’t tell me to change the system. In case you haven’t noticed the system has not changed and I will not live for ever. I have to make a choice based on the society and the system I live in now.
Should I get married?
I am young enough to be a father but too ancient to rebuild all my life after divorce again. I still want to be an involved father more than whatever business in the world. Until just just I thought this meant I needed to get married again. But the dates I have had just have caused me to question this assumption. Do I need a wife? Perhaps excellent reader you want to offer your view on this topic.
Under NZ law a 3 year defaco relationship is the same as marriage. So for a male any long term relationship carries all the same risks as marriage. For simplicity I will talk in this area “marriage” or “being married”. But in fact I mean “have a relationship for longer than 3 years”. In other words it is not relevant if there is a marriage ceremony or not. That is not the issue. It is just rather long winded to say should I stay with a woman for more than 3 years?
Dear reader keep in mind that my parents were childhood sweathearts who married until “fatality do us part”. Which to them meant exactly that. Therefore this is my view of marriage also. I have by no means had any problem getting dates. I was married. Staying married requires both peple to work on the relationship which requires certain qualities. Finding a woman who is and will always stay comitted to marriage I have found to be so far impracticable.
I am still open to that. If happen to bump into the like of my life then fantastic. I surely take fantastic pleasure in loving and being loved by a name special.
But now I am questioning why would I hunt for it and sign up to marriage?
It is nice and would be best for any child but the risks and costs are extrodinary. Any child has a high risk of being denied one parent anyway. It seems to me that the laws and women themselves have priced themselves out of the market. I don’t want to reach retirement in poverty it is right. But more than that I can’t afford to have another child shut out of my life. But there is a greater than 50% chance of exactly both of those things happening.
Do I risk having a shortened life of poverty for a 50% chance of having a child and a wife?
Or do I find another way to have a child (who may well have no mother) ?
Delight don’t tell me to change the system. In case you haven’t noticed the system has not changed and I will not live for ever. I have to make a choice based on the society and the system I live in now.
Should I get married?
I am young enough to be a father but too ancient to rebuild all my life after divorce again. I still want to be an involved father more than whatever business in the world. Until just just I thought this meant I needed to get married again. But the dates I have had just have caused me to question this assumption. Do I need a wife? Perhaps excellent reader you want to offer your view on this topic.
Under NZ law a 3 year defaco relationship is the same as marriage. So for a male any long term relationship carries all the same risks as marriage. For simplicity I will talk in this area “marriage” or “being married”. But in fact I mean “have a relationship for longer than 3 years”. In other words it is not relevant if there is a marriage ceremony or not. That is not the issue. It is just rather long winded to say should I stay with a woman for more than 3 years?
Dear reader keep in mind that my parents were childhood sweathearts who married until “fatality do us part”. Which to them meant exactly that. Therefore this is my view of marriage also. I have by no means had any problem getting dates. I was married. Staying married requires both peple to work on the relationship which requires certain qualities. Finding a woman who is and will always stay comitted to marriage I have found to be so far impracticable.
I am still open to that. If happen to bump into the like of my life then fantastic. I surely take fantastic pleasure in loving and being loved by a name special.
But now I am questioning why would I hunt for it and sign up to marriage?
It is nice and would be best for any child but the risks and costs are extrodinary. Any child has a high risk of being denied one parent anyway. It seems to me that the laws and women themselves have priced themselves out of the market. I don’t want to reach retirement in poverty it is right. But more than that I can’t afford to have another child shut out of my life. But there is a greater than 50% chance of exactly both of those things happening.
Do I risk having a shortened life of poverty for a 50% chance of having a child and a wife?
Or do I find another way to have a child (who may well have no mother) ?
Delight don’t tell me to change the system. In case you haven’t noticed the system has not changed and I will not live for ever. I have to make a choice based on the society and the system I live in now.
Should I get married?
I am young enough to be a father but too ancient to rebuild all my life after divorce again. I still want to be an involved father more than whatever business in the world. Until just just I thought this meant I needed to get married again. But the dates I have had just have caused me to question this assumption. Do I need a wife? Perhaps excellent reader you want to offer your view on this topic.
Under NZ law a 3 year defaco relationship is the same as marriage. So for a male any long term relationship carries all the same risks as marriage. For simplicity I will talk in this area “marriage” or “being married”. But in fact I mean “have a relationship for longer than 3 years”. In other words it is not relevant if there is a marriage ceremony or not. That is not the issue. It is just rather long winded to say should I stay with a woman for more than 3 years?
Dear reader keep in mind that my parents were childhood sweathearts who married until “fatality do us part”. Which to them meant exactly that. Therefore this is my view of marriage also. I have by no means had any problem getting dates. I was married. Staying married requires both peple to work on the relationship which requires certain qualities. Finding a woman who is and will always stay comitted to marriage I have found to be so far impracticable.
I am still open to that. If happen to bump into the like of my life then fantastic. I surely take fantastic pleasure in loving and being loved by a name special.
But now I am questioning why would I hunt for it and sign up to marriage?
It is nice and would be best for any child but the risks and costs are extrodinary. Any child has a high risk of being denied one parent anyway. It seems to me that the laws and women themselves have priced themselves out of the market. I don’t want to reach retirement in poverty it is right. But more than that I can’t afford to have another child shut out of my life. But there is a greater than 50% chance of exactly both of those things happening.
Do I risk having a shortened life of poverty for a 50% chance of having a child and a wife?
Or do I find another way to have a child (who may well have no mother) ?
Delight don’t tell me to change the system. In case you haven’t noticed the system has not changed and I will not live for ever. I have to make a choice based on the society and the system I live in now.
Powered by Max Banner Ads
